Spouse dating after divorce
This is a common issue after divorce, so there’s a separate page on Rebound Relationships After Divorce.Tom sat across the lunch table from me, glowing with excitement for his new love. It was obvious that she had touched him and that he was convinced that this was the “real thing.” I quizzed him for details. Remember, your children have gone (or are going) through the same grieving process you did, and they may be at any number of points in the process.You two were a couple, and to see your spouse with someone else will trigger feelings in you that may be surprising and unpleasant.It does not mean you are still in love but rather you are witnessing the evidence that your spouse now has someone else in the place you used to fill.So now you’ve moved through most of the crud of divorce.You’re still grieving, but you can see the light at the end of the tunnel. You’re wondering about moving on with your romantic life. Whether you should refrain from dating before your divorce is final is both a strategic and moral question.
You wouldn't want to get children's hopes up, and your choice can confuse friends who have accepted your accounts of the divorce that typically frame the ex-spouse in a less-then-positive light.
My previous blog ("Should You Date Your Ex-Spouse," dated 1/17/11) made the audacious proposal for considering dating an ex-spouse, since the likelihood of strong positive feelings when getting married could create a positive basis for a renewed relationship, if both parties have matured and stopped blaming each other.
Dating an ex-spouse should not be simply a response to loneliness, matter of convenience and/or lack of alternatives.
Even if your husband has carried on numerous affairs during your marriage, he will not think that you are justified in seeing someone new at this time.
All he will focus on is that he has been wronged and will want to seek justice anyway he can.